GROSS STUPIDITY DEFINED
I first heard the phrase "Gross stupidity drives me up the wall!" while listening to a call- in radio show. The host was talking about the Patty Hearst kidnapping. A woman called in to tell the host he was wrong about some details. When the host asked the caller how she knew she was correct the lady replied that she had seen the kidnapping on TV. The host told her she hadn't seen the actual act but had seen a recreation. When the lady insisted that she had seen the whole thing on TV the host asked "Do you think anybody would be dumb enough to call up a TV station and tell them they were going to kidnap somebody and tell the TV people where and when?" The lady said," They must have, how else would the TV people know about it? ". At that point the host uttered the phrase that I have since extended to "Gross stupidity and incompetence drive me up the wall".
The "Gross" part of the statement needs some definition. All of us, no matter how intelligent or careful, have done or said something stupid. We are, after all, just humans. I am sure at one time or another we all have slapped ourselves on the head while saying, "What a stupid thing I have done", you know like smashing a finger in a car door or hitting your thumb with a hammer. These are normal stupid. Perhaps I can better define "Gross Stupidity." with an example:
I once operated a restaurant in western Pennsylvania. Some of the people in the area had lived there a little too long and as a result had brain damage, no doubt caused by inhaling fumes from coke ovens and steel mills. I make this statement so that you will know, by current legal and politically correct standards; my customers were not responsible for their actions. At any rate, we had decided to replace a damaged sidewalk that led to a side entrance. We had blocked the area under repair with bright yellow wooden horses. Outside the wooden horse barriers we had constructed a barrier using boxes, yellow tape, lights and huge signs with arrows telling people to use the door on the other side of the building. After all these preparations we poured and finished the new sidewalk. About ten minutes later my manager came into my office and said "I want you to come out and see this". A woman was standing in wet concrete up to her ankles, trying to get in the door. She had moved boxes aside, ducked under the yellow tape, moved a wooden horse and walked at least three steps in wet concrete. I walked outside and asked her if she knew that she was standing in wet cement. She asked "Why is the door locked?" That, people, is an example of gross stupidity. We helped the lady clean up and gave her a free lunch. She seemed normal, just had a bad case of the "grosses"
The same definition applies to incompetence. I am incompetent when it comes to insurance. The poor agent can explain something to me and I say something intelligent like "duhhh!". So I am incompetent in some areas; everybody is. To qualify as gross you have to do something special, like, be paid! You all have met them, they are everywhere. They are standing there, being paid to help you and they literally can't find their rear end with both hands. I am not talking about part time help, I am talking about somebody like the boss’s son-in-law who has been in the business for five years and can't direct you to the restroom.
I am sure you have all had at least one experience that defines "gross". Drop me a line and tell me about it. It may qualify as a "Mind Boggler".
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